St. Joseph is the patron saint of a happy death, probably because he died with Mary and Jesus on either side of his death bed. I prayed to St. Joseph as my mother and father prepared for death. Dad was confined to bed for three years or more, only rarely being helped out, and mom was his chief caregiver. It didn’t seem happy at the time. It was hard on dad and mom and on our whole family. Everybody helped out and prayed. Death is never easy, but still in the most difficult experience, if your heart is open, there is the goodness of God. The strength of family, even as the weaknesses and struggles there were also evident. God is present when we are pushed beyond what we choose for ourselves. Think of the story of how the birth of Jesus came about.
So much of the story of Christmas focuses on the Virgin Mary. A virgin is, in a physical sense, a person who has not engaged in sexual intercourse. The scriptures use the physical sense to illuminate spiritual realities. A virgin is, in a larger sense, unspoiled. We speak of a virgin forest as a wooded expanse that has never been logged. Virgin olive oil is the oil directly from the olive, never having been cooked or chemically treated. Virgin refers to a person’s heart open to God.
In today’s gospel, the story focuses on Joseph. Mary told Joseph she was pregnant by the power of the Holy Spirit. Joseph decided to divorce her quietly so as to not expose her to public embarrassment or worse. On the surface, Joseph could not have been please by these developments. God intervenes and an angel comes to tell Joseph,
“Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her. She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus,* because he will save his people from their sins.” Mt. 1:20-21
The scriptures emphasize a virgin womb and a virgin tomb because these physical realities are images of what kind of space is needed within the human heart to create space for something divine to be born. The soul of a man must be receptive to God. If a human heart is filled with unclean things, like self-centeredness, grandiosity, resentment, cynicism and distrust, what room is there for the Divine? What is needed is the capacity to make a commitment, fidelity, generosity of spirit and an openness that the work of God is not always apparent, but there anyway. A virgin heart is patient waiting for the divine to be born.
I remember St. Joseph and the happy death of my parents. They were surrounded by supportive family, prayer and care. At the heart of St. Joseph’s story are the choices that he made when confronted by struggles he did not choose. Unplanned pregnancy, threats to his family present and future. At each decision point, he chose fidelity, commitment and openness to the Divine. He was tempted to take the easier path and set the whole business of Mary and her child aside. There was more openness to God in St. Joseph’s life, however, than disappointment. His heart was a pure and unspoiled place for God. That is, in the end, is what constitutes virginal space, the space within which God can be born