Thirteenth Sunday: Losing your life in order to find it

When you walked into mass, you probably reached into the holy water font and made the sign of the cross on your body. Jesus, when nailed to the cross, was stripped of human dignity, family, disciples and life. In death, however, he was revealed as the Risen Son of God. The water that you blessed yourself with, is the sign of being baptized into the death of Christ. St. Paul said,

“Are you unaware that we who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death?
We were indeed buried with him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead
by the glory of the Father,
we too might live in newness of life.” Rom. 6

We find our true life by dying.

The Gospel: You find life by dying…a paradox
Death takes many forms before physical death. In the Gospel, Jesus tells the Twelve that,

"Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and whoever does not take up his cross
and follow after me is not worthy of me.
Whoever finds his life will lose it,
and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” Mt. 10

It is hard to wean ourselves from making lesser loves the equal of God. Jesus teaches this in a paradox. A paradox forces us to look for meaning beyond the obvious contradiction in the words. How can finding life result from losing life?  We have to get our loves in the right order.

The challenge in Jesus’ time: Hating father and mother and finding life
The Lord was teaching a culture where family was a central, powerful reality. The ancient Middle Eastern family was the source of power and security for the individual. It consisted of multiple generations all living in one place. The ideal spouse for a child was their first cousin because that kinship marriage bound the family more tightly together. To sever family ties, as in the story of the Prodigal son, cut you off from the land, work, family and security. You didn’t turn your back on your family. But conversion to Christianity might sever your ties to your Jewish family.  Family could be an alternate experience of meaning at odds with Jesus’s call to follow. 

The challenge in our time: Consumerism as a substitute for love of God and family

Christianity changed the idea of family. Family is nested within community and church. The ideal is that our families are sacramental, grace-filled communities connected to and engaged in a larger world on which the well-being of the family in-part depends. In Catholic teaching, families should not turn in on themselves. By focusing also on the needs of others, families die to themselves and find life. In this way, Christian families, grow in self-giving love within and outside the bonds of kinship.

 
There are threats to this ideal of Christian family life. There is probably no threat greater to this vision of family than the unrestrained consumer culture. A fascination with endless accumulation makes families turn in on themselves. New advertising campaigns are designed to create needs in us that we didn’t know we had. When happiness depends on the next thing to buy, other people’s needs can be seen as in competition with our own happiness. Our simpler choices make room for others’ needs. The paradox, sometimes less is more, describes the experience of some families. By saying “no” to a want we express a deeper reality to the meaning of family; namely openness to the needs of others.
 
Blessing ourselves is the sign that points to finding life
When we dip our fingers in the water and make the sign of the cross, whether we think about it or not, something fundamental is at stake. The paradox present is that in dying with Christ we rise to share in his resurrection. God as the ultimate source of meaning is at odds with distorted ideas of love of family finding expression in consumerism. Real family love participates in the needs of the larger community. Love does not turn in on itself.  Consumer goods make our lives easier and, sometimes, happy, but not always and not for long. It is not family or things that are bad, but they do become bad when they take the place to be occupied by love of God. Families turning out from themselves to the needs of others find themselves in dying to selfishness. They also inoculate children from the disease of consumerism.